Found him... :)

My soulmate. He's been found. :) <3 He's just amazing and sweet and kind and generous and I want to spend every day with him forever.

Short and sweet. :)

I'm so Bloohoohoo....

Well folks, I got dumped. So here's the obligatory I-got-dumped post. *shrug* Do those even exist? They do now.

I don't even know what I did wrong. We fight and argue a lot, he says that's why he's done, but people who live together fight. Maybe not as often as us, but we can work though it right? Right? ..... I guess not. I don't want this to be the end. I really want to try. I didn't know it was such a problem. I'd hate to give up and move back to where my family is at, and then have him change his mind. Once I've moved, I'm done. I'm not going through the hassle again. But if I find out that things could have maybe worked out, it'd kill me inside. I'm already dead there anyways so I guess it doesn't matter.

This is me at the moment.

Haha looks like I missed a spot. But hey I also wanted to showcase my cool Paint thing. My eyes are the "crayon" feature and it's awesome cuz it looks like they're watery, which they are.

Anyways! Off you go. Not much else to say.

Birthday

I had my 21st birthday a few days ago! *cue happy dance* I figured I had to make the obligatory birthday post, even if it is a few days late. I have a new laptop since my last posts, and it has Windows 7 on it and the newest paint and such and OMG PAINT IS SO AWESOME. However, I'm having issues controlling my mousepad on this computer because the click buttons aren't separate buttons like I'm used to on my old laptop, and this laptop has a silly thing where if you hold down the button for a bit, once you let up, it'll still act like it's holding down... So if you're drawing in paint, and you hold down the button to drag your line or whatever, and you let go, thinking you're done drawing your line, the laptop is like "LA LA LA I'M STILL DRAWING".

I can see where it'd be helpful, if you're scrolling through something endlessly or something, but to me it's super annoying. -.-

Anyways! Birthday. So Tim took me to Ulta and let me get a bunch of stuff for my birthday. I got a Bare Minerals starter kit. Let's talk about this stuff. It's amazing. When I was putting it on at first I didn't think it'd cover my face enough, but by the time I was finished with the whole regime, it looked really natural but everything was covered! It's kind of expensive, $60 for a starter kit, but you use so little makeup ("less is more") and it's so good for you, I figure it should hopefully pay for itself. I also got some Urban Decay mascara that I LOVE, and some miscellaneous loofas and bath stuff and face wash (Mario Badescu brand is the best face care btw).

Dad sent me money to help me start a fund for a downpayment on a car. The goal is to save up enough to just buy a new (used) care outright though since I can't really make car payments since my paychecks are like $25 each week. Seriously, Brookstone cut two of my shifts last week so I only worked for 3 hours. WTF guys, I've got bills to pay! Ugh. Anyways.

Mom sent me a package of goodies that got here the other day. I got hair curlers, a nice water bottle, workout clothes, a spoon rest for when you're cooking stuff on the stove, lotion that smells amazing, workout clothes, and an onion chopper. An onion chopper, you say? Check it out. Coolest thing ever.

I'm really excited to use this thing! It's awesome. Mom's had one for years and I always love using it.

We went to Outback for my birthday dinner (and had Macaroni Grille for lunch so I was quite well-fed that day). I ordered my first adult drink ^-^ and much excitement and fun was had.

It was a great day, andddd there you have it!

Don't Be Stupid

My step sister recently got a nice, brand new car that I'm almost positive she didn't pay a penny for.  She just turned 16 this past summer and already has a new car? Yeah, anyways, so she has a new car and when I found this out, I'll admit I was jealous.  I still have my first car-- a 1999 Oldsmobile Cutlass (Big Agnes). She's treated me well, and has lasted over the years. I got her when I was 17, and I had to pay a third of the cost, mind you. I'm now almost 21 and still have 'er.  Anyways, obviously I was jealous. But that's besides the point.

Hahaha I can't draw cars worth a crap.  Anyways, last month I'm talking to my dad and he tells me that my step sister totaled her car. Not just a fender bender. Totaled. Gee, I thought, maybe that's why you don't buy 16 year olds brand new cars.  Apparently it went down like this.  The roads were slippery and icy, and my step mom told her not to go to this particular friend's house because she lived on a back road that was bound to not have been treated.

Well, she decides to go anyway, because what 16 year old can resist rebelling against what anyone else would see as a perfectly acceptable request?  Anyways, I guess she got her friend successfully, and then on the way home there was a downhill slope with a curve at the bottom, and a nice friendly tree just waiting to be hit.

 

And hit it they did.  Okay, so there wasn't an explosion. And everyone was okay! (I wouldn't be writing this post if they weren't--I'm not that big of a bitch).  Apparently they weren't wearing their seatbelts. And apparently she had the nerve to tell my father "Seatbelts aren't cool."

....

I'm sorry, what!?  What an idiot..... She's lucky she didn't go through the windshield.  I don't really know what the point of this was. I hadn't written in a while and my last post was all depressing and picture-less. Anyways, the moral of the story is... Don't be stupid.

 

Struggles

What are you supposed to do with bad news? Do you tell people about it? Do you take it in and say nothing? I mean, what is there to do? Is there a right and wrong way to deal with stuff? Obviously there's no rule book for this kind of thing.... I always feel weird telling people about any bad news I hear... I feel like they'll think I'm looking for pity, which I'm not. It's not good to bottle things up. Trust me, I know this. So I'll blog about it.

My oldest brother is battling addiction to both drugs and alcohol. He has been for quite some time now. He tried rehab and didn't stay with it for that long so he's been living with my Dad for the past two months, going to meetings every day and had found a new job and everything. He just got his 2 month chip... Then he got some upsetting news and he went to a bar, got drunk, drove somewhere, hit someone, and didn't stop. A hit and run is a felony. I don't know what's going to happen with that. Is he going to jail? I mean, he honestly should, as mean of me as that sounds. The legal system is there for a reason... But if he goes to jail, I don't know if he'll.... last... He's a danger to himself even outside of a jail cell in the "real world". What would happen if he ends up in prison?

What happens if I get a phone call some day saying that I no longer have three brothers living on this earth....? Wow.

Let's hope this doesn't ever happen.

My Mom has to put one of our old dogs to sleep tomorrow. We've had Sonny for years, I think he's 13 or 14, and he's just old and creaky and his back end just completely stopped working, he can't stand even to go pee or poop. =( It's so sad. I'm grateful I got to see him when I went home for Christmas, and got to pat his head and say good bye because we all knew he probably wouldn't last too long.

Ugh what a terrible night. =( Sorry for the terrible depressing blog.

Halloween!

Happy Halloween!!!!!

It's been a while since I've blogged. I don't know how many people actually read this, or even noticed, but sorry anyways. I've been pretty busy with school, and then I got sick with God-knows-what, and I'm still trying to get better. My throat felt like this: 

 My ears felt like this:

And this was me:

That poor sad blanketed girl in the picture was NOT drawn by me. I took it from Allie Brosh's blog at hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com so I don't want to take the credit for it. Her page is strictly enforced by the copyright monster, so here's to hoping this satiates his hunger. Seriously though, her blog is hilarious, and you need to go look at it now!CLICK HERE FOR RAINBOWS AND AWESOME CAKE


Anyways, on to the Halloween part of the blog. I didn't get to carve a pumpkin for the past couple years, which is pretty sad. This year I was determined to carve an awesome pumpkin, like something along these lines:

 Picture from here

Also, Star Wars FTW.


Unfortunately, my only carving tool was a very dull steak knife, making it super hard to carve even the most simple of faces.  Anyways, here's the final result:

I named him Jack. I have a squirrel that I named Gilbert that comes to my back porch to drink out of an old basin (failed at growing a water lily). I'm hoping Jack and Gilbert become best of friends.

So, that's it for this short Halloween blog. Everyone go get candy, be safe, and have fun!

Along Came A Spider

Today, I slayed a spider.


It went a little something like this...

 

As soon as I saw the fangs, it was war. After a minor freak-out.

BRING IT.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is when I killed a spider. In cold blood.